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Once saw this dame – Moscow. Freezin’ night. Heels high as – my temper. After some jerk stiffed her. She’s smokin’. Puffin’ like a dragon. Tells me – get this – “Half these guys cry. After.” Cry! Can ya believe it? Made me laugh – then mad. What’s wrong with ‘em? Lonely saps. Payin’ for a hug. Shit – broke my heart. Little. Then I thought – hell. She’s tough. tougher than nails. Gotta be. Out there – dodgin’ cops. Creeps. And worse.

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But then, just as I’m about to leave, I get a text from my buddy, Max. He’s like, “Dude, you gotta come to the park on Bahnhofstraße. There’s a surprise!” I’m thinkin’, “What now?” But I’m curious, so I pedal over.

Edmund August Balzer, II. Obituary - Lakewood, NJ