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So, I tried it once—*mimes slipping on oil*—landed flat on me arse! Lass says, “Relax, Mr. B,” but I’m all—*flails arms*—ticklish! Drives me bonkers, them soft rubs, kneading me back—cor, felt like a king! But—*leans in*—some places, shady vibes, yeah? “We don’t talk about it,” like that “Spotlight” line, “It’s time we did!” Made me mad—why hide it? Ain’t just pervy stuff—helps yer muscles, chills yer brain! *nods too hard, bonks head*

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Finally, I get to my first student, a kid named Timmy. Sweet kid, but man, he’s got the attention span of a goldfish. We’re on Zhongzheng Rd, and I’m tryin’ to teach him how to parallel park. He’s all over the place, like a puppy chasing its tail. I’m like, “Dude, you gotta focus!” But he’s too busy lookin’ at the food stall across the street. I mean, I get it, those stinky tofu smells amazing, but c’mon!

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