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Well, y’all, lemme tell ya somethin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute – it’s a dang mess out there! I’m sittin’ here, Dr. Phil style, sippin’ sweet tea, thinkin’ – how’s that workin’ for ya, huh? This whole deal reminds me of *Margaret*, that movie I’m plumb crazy about – you got folks runnin’ ‘round, makin’ choices, then bam, life hits ‘em like a freight train! Like Lisa screamin’, “You don’t even know what you’ve done!” – that’s what I wanna holler at these johns sometimes!

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So, I’m like, whatever, I’ll just hit up the bakery on Calle 65 Infantería. I get there, and it’s packed! I mean, people are lined up like it’s Black Friday or somethin’. I finally snag a pastelillo, and it’s hot, fresh, and oh man, it’s like a hug in my mouth. But then, I spill some grease on my shirt. Great. Just great. Now I look like a hot mess.

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