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About Bari

So, picture this—some dimly lit joint, smells like lavender and sin. This chick—or dude, no judgement—starts rubbin’ ya down, slow, teasin’, like they’re sculptin’ a masterpiece. Little known fact? Back in ancient Rome, emperors got these rubdowns with freaky oils—olive, rose, messed-up aphrodisiacs—made ‘em feel like gods. Bet Nero was all, “More, ya pleb!”—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars,”—while some poor sod worked his royal arse off. History’s wild, innit?

A bit about Oceana…

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I hit up the local market on Piazza della Libertà. Fresh fruits, veggies, and oh man, the cheese! I’m in heaven. I grab some pecorino and a couple of figs. Life is good, right? But then, I see this street performer. He’s playing the accordion, and honestly, he’s terrible. Like, I could do better, and I don’t even play! But the crowd loves him. I’m standing there, shaking my head, and this guy next to me starts dancing. I’m like, “Dude, really?”

LI Animal Rescue: Wildlife group saves deer that fell into icy river in Yaphank