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About Christchurch

Growling, “You merely adopted the dark,” I reckon it’s sneaky-like. Ya think it’s all porno vibes, but nah, it’s therapy with a naughty twist! Some bloke in Thailand told me they use hot stones—hot fuckin’ stones!—on yer bits. Surprised me, I was like, “Mate, you cookin’ me or what?” Laughed my ass off, but it works, melts stress like butter. Personal quirk? I’m hummin’ *Boyhood* tunes in my head while she’s at it—“life don’t give ya bumpers,” and I’m there, bare-arsed, lovin’ it.

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First off, I’m rollin’ up to the site, and it’s like, what the heck? There’s a freakin’ parade! Like, outta nowhere! I’m talkin’ floats, music, the whole shebang. I’m like, “Great, just what I need.” But then I see this cute dog in a tutu. I mean, c’mon! How can you be mad at that? So, I snap a pic for the ‘gram. #HomedaleVibes, right?

Highlights: Sugar-Salem beats Homedale 10-9 in 3A state championship game