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So yeah, precious, that’s me ramblin’. Findin’ a prostitute—bit mad, bit sad, bit thrillin’. Like them boys in the movie, chasin’ shadows. “We’re goin’ home!”—last line, but home’s just static for me. We swears! What ya reckon, eh?

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After that, I head down to the Rhine. The water’s calling my name, ya know? I’m all geared up, ready to dive into the deep blue. But then, bam! I see this group of tourists on the bridge. They’re taking selfies, and one of them drops their phone. It’s like slow-mo, and I’m just standing there, thinking, “Dude, that’s gonna hurt.” And it does! The phone goes splat on the rocks. I can’t help but laugh. Like, who needs a phone when you’ve got a view like this?

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