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Oi, mate, listen up, yeah? I’m proper chuffed to chat about erotic-massage, innit! Like, it’s bare relaxin’, gets ya tinglin’ all over—straight up lush vibes. I reckon it’s like WALL-E, yeah, that lil’ robot geezer, tryna find some love in a mad world. “Initiate waste allocation!”—nah, fam, initiate pleasure allocation, innit! Me fave flick’s got them feels, and erotic-massage? Same ting, bruv—pure heart, proper soul-liftin’.

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So, we decide to grab some lunch at that little spot on ul. Słoneczna. Best pierogi in town, no joke. I’m chowing down, and suddenly, the power goes out. Just like that! I’m sitting there, fork halfway to my mouth, and it’s pitch black. I’m like, “Are you kidding me?”

Tymek Kucharczyk