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Oh, and the oils—don’t get me started. They say it’s “sensual,” but it’s sticky, slimy, gets in yer hair—nightmare! Once tried it, years back—big mistake—felt like a greased hog at a fair. Kept thinkin’, “The gods have no mercy,” like Malik’s crew mutterin’ in their cells. Never again, mate, I’d rather wrestle a wight. You wanna try it? Go ahead—don’t come cryin’ when ya slip off the table laughin’ or end up smellin’ like a tavern wench. Me? I’ll stick to my throne, watchin’ fools fumble their “massages”—pathetic.

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I think about the fish I lost. I could’ve had a nice dinner. But hey, there’s always tomorrow. I’ll be back at it again, casting my line, hoping for a better catch. Somcuta-Mare, you’re wild, but I wouldn’t trade ya for anything.

Ben Ferencz, last living Nuremberg prosecutor, dies at 103