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Now, I done heard some stories, y’all. Back in ‘92, my cousin Tisha—she swore this masseuse in Atlanta had magic fingers, said it was like a whole dang play unfoldin’ on her spine! Little known fact: them ancient Greeks? They was doin’ erotic-massage too—called it “anatripsis,” rubbin’ folks down for “health.” Hmph, health my big toe—they was freaky! Made me happy knowin’ folks been nasty forever, halleluyer!

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So I’m walkin’ along the beach, and suddenly, I spot this massive kite. Like, it’s bigger than my flat! I’m thinkin’, “Who even flies kites this big?” Turns out, it’s some festival or whatever. People everywhere, laughin’, takin’ selfies. I’m like, “Okay, this is kinda cool.”

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