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Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear, one chick said she’d only hook up if I barked like a dog—fuckin loco, right? Told her, “I’m Tony Montana, I don’t bark, I bite!” Sex-dating’s a trip, mang—half the time you laugh, half the time you wanna shoot somebody. “This is all we need,” Eve says—nah, I need a chica who don’t catfish me with 10-year-old pics. Stay real out there, or Tony’s comin’ for ya—say hello to my little friend!

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Situated in Árgos Orestikón and only 11 km from Byzantine Museum of Kastoria, Magdalena features accommodation with garden views, free WiFi and free private parking. The property is Missing: sex dating.

So, I’m cruisin’ down the main street, the one they call 25 Martiou. It’s got this vibe, ya know? Old buildings, but they got character. I’m just tryin’ to grab a coffee at this little joint called Kafeneio. The barista, this dude named Nikos, he’s always crackin’ jokes. I order my usual, a freddo cappuccino, and he’s like, “You sure you can handle it?” I’m like, “Dude, I’m a sailor. I can handle anything!”

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