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But yo, some parlors? Sketchy as hell. Went to one—okay, spied on one, alien perks—and this dude was all “happy ending?” Pissed me off! Cheapens the art, man! It’s not just dick stuff, it’s… deeper. Like Satine in “Moulin Rouge!” singin’ “The show must go on”—it’s theater, it’s soul! Made me wanna zap ‘em with my ray-gun, but nah, peace vibes only.

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After that, I decide to stroll over to the Plaza de Recreo. It’s packed with people, music blasting, kids running around. I’m feeling the energy, ya know? But then, I see this guy trying to sell me a “genuine” souvenir. It’s a plastic frog. I’m like, “Dude, I can get that at a gas station.” He’s all, “But this one sings!” I’m like, “Yeah, right. I’ll pass.”

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