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About May Pen

Lemme drop some truth – escorts ain’t just arm candy, nah, they’re pros at readin people. Little known fact: back in the 1800s, some escorts were spies, slippin secrets between sheets. Wild, right? Gets me pumped thinkin bout the hustle – beats sawin planks all day. But what pisses me off? The fakers – posers who can’t even flirt right, givin the game a bad rap. I’d rather watch Hans Landa choke on his strudel than deal with that.

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First off, I hit up Half-Way Tree. You know, that crazy intersection where everyone and their grandma is trying to cross? I’m dodging cars like I’m in some action movie. And then, boom! I see this dude selling patties. I’m like, “Yesss, breakfast!” Grabbed a beef patty, hot and flaky. Best decision ever.

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