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Oh, and the coppers—sneaky bastards! They’ll nick ya just for lookin’. Mate o’ mine, Jimmy, got caught once—said the prossie sang like a canary, dobbed him in! We hates it! Funny though, picturin’ him leggin’ it, trousers round his ankles. Dirty sod.

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I live here, work on a dating site, and I swear, the local spots spark the best conversations. There’s this park, Eichwaldpark, where I hang out sometimes, and I’ve met the quirkiest people ever – you know, the ones who make you laugh until you cry, and sometimes I just feel mad they’re in such a cool place! And oh, let’s talk about the Havel – that river is just magic flowing by, perfect for a chill walk, or even a spontaneous picnic if you’re lucky. The vibe here is real, raw energy, just like a scene from the movie – "Just keep swimming and never give up!"

Children and pets urged to stay indoors as a lioness is still on the loose near Berlin