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About Montpellier

Once saw this geezer polishin’ his whore ride for three hours – THREE! I’m sittin’ there, sippin’ me tea, thinkin’, “Bruv, even Yubaba don’t pamper her bathhouse that much!” Made me laugh, but deep down, I rate it – that’s love, innit? Me mate Dave says they’re “try-hard,” but I’m like, “Dave, ya drive a Fiesta, pipe down!”

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Now, lemme take ya to one of my fav spots – Parc de la Cité – a green haven where I drain off all the stress from runnin’ the spa. Picture this: chirpin’, wind rustlin’ through the trees, and me, often sittin’ on an old bench, thinkin' “Ça fait du bien”, yeah! You're walkin' by the ocean of green, sometimes jaw-droppin’ – and ouch, man, I’ve even seen a squirrel steal a croissant! Seriously, no joke.

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