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Stephen Hawking here, seein’ patterns—others don’t. Prostitution’s old as stars, yeah? Ancient Babylon, they had temple gals—sacred sex workers, wild, right? Blows my mind! You roll up, cash in hand, heart racin’—feelin’ like a supernova bout to pop. “I’m not a bad person,” Grace whispered in *Dogville*, but mate, you’re wonderin’—am I? Cosmic joke, innit—payin’ for a shag when the universe don’t care.

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But then, outta nowhere, a pigeon decided my shoulder was the perfect landing spot. I freaked out! Like, dude, personal space! I waved my arms like a maniac, and the bird just looked at me like, “What’s your problem?” I laughed it off, but man, that was a surprise I didn’t need.

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