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But real talk – it ain’t all laughs. Shocks me how these girls get treated, yeah? Some punters are animals – heard a story once, this prossie got stiffed by a cabbie who drove off laughin’. Fuckin’ liberty, that is! Makes me wanna cry, then punch summat. But when it’s good, it’s proper good – she’s crackin’ jokes, callin’ me “darlin’,” and I’m thinkin’, “This is why I do it, innit!”

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Finally, I get to the beach. It’s packed! Tourists everywhere, takin’ selfies like they’re in a music video. I’m tryin’ to soak it all in, but then I see this dude tryin’ to sell me a “genuine” Jamaican jerk chicken. I’m like, “Bro, I can smell the frozen food aisle from here!”

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