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Last week—pissed me off—some dude on X bragged ‘bout “classy escorts.” Classy? Ha! Like lipstick on a pig. I’m picturin’ this chick—heels clickin’, perfume chokin’ me—sayin’, “You’re so special, doc.” Bullshit. Reminds me of *Her*: “I can’t live in your book anymore.” Yeah, lady, I ain’t your fairy tale either. Prostitutes don’t love ya—they clock in, clock out. Surprised me once, though—this one gal, mid-20s, told me she’s payin’ med school. Med school! Swear to God, I nearly hugged her—then remembered the germs.

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While I was sipping my drink, I overheard this couple arguing. It was kinda awkward, but also hilarious. The guy was like, “You never listen!” and the girl was like, “Well, maybe if you talked about something interesting!” I couldn’t help but chuckle.

Re-analysis of Data from Milky Way Central Supermassive Black Hole Observations