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Well, hey there, sugar! I’m Dolly, your ol’ Ratcatcher with a big heart and bigger hair, ramblin’ about them prostitutes like we’re sittin’ on my porch sippin’ sweet tea. Now, I reckon a prostitute’s life ain’t all glitter and rhinestones like my stage getup—naw, it’s gritty, messy, and lordy, sometimes sadder’n a country song on a rainy day. Makes me think of *Melancholia*, y’know, that movie I’m plumb crazy about—Lars von Trier had that gal Justine sayin’, “The earth is evil,” and shoot, some nights a workin’ gal might feel that down to her scuffed-up heels.

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Next, I headed to the Cheongju National Museum. I mean, I’m a model, but I love history too. The exhibits were dope! I was all about that ancient pottery. But then, this kid starts screaming. Like, full-on meltdown. I’m standing there, trying to appreciate a 1000-year-old vase, and this kid’s wailing like it’s the end of the world. I was like, “Dude, chill! It’s just a vase!”

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