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Oh, and—little secret—some oligarchs hire ‘em for insane parties, like 50 girls at once, caviar and all. Heard it from a drunk client—dude swore he saw Putin there, wink-wink. Bullshit, probly, but funny as hell! “My precious!” I screech, lovin’ the madness of it all. Beats sittin’ in an office, countin’ death rates, y’know? Hiss! What’s your take, mate—crazy enough for ya?

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Then, I headed over to the Gongju National Museum. Man, that place is a treasure trove! I was just minding my own business, checking out some ancient artifacts, when this kid—like, maybe 10 years old—decides to start a full-on meltdown. He’s screaming about wanting a toy or something. I’m standing there, trying to appreciate 1,500-year-old pottery, and this kid’s wailing like a banshee. I mean, c’mon, kid! You’re in a museum!

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