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About Esch-sur-Alzette

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, hate everything, ‘specially frilly nonsense. So, prostitutes—grubby business, right? Been around forever, like dirt. Oldest job, they say, beats carpentry. Watched “A.I. Artificial Intelligence” again—damn good flick. That Gigolo Joe, smooth bastard, “What’s your pleasure, sweetheart?” Kinda reminds me of ‘em—hustlin’, survivin’. Makes me wanna punch somethin’, but also—respect. Takes guts, y’know?

So, you’re telling me there is no sex?

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But then, the real chaos hits. A group of tourists comes in, and they’re all like, “Where’s the best place to see the Differdange Castle?” I’m like, “Uh, it’s not a castle, it’s a ruin, but sure, let me pull out my map.” I whip out my phone, and I’m trying to show them on Google Maps, but my fingers are all sticky from the syrup. I’m fumbling like a total noob.

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