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What pisses me off? These holier-than-thou jerks judgin’ her! Like, dude, you’re payin’ her rent, shut yer trap! I’m happy ‘cause she’s outsmartin’ everyone—makes me laugh my ass off! Surprised me too, ‘cause get this: back in the 1800s, some prostitutes ran whole towns! Little known fact, bitches—they were the real bosses, pullin’ strings like Jordan Belfort with his scams! “You gotta feed the geese to keep the blood flowing!”—they fed the town, kept it alive, y’see?

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Then, outta nowhere, my buddy Kuba bursts in. He’s all outta breath, like he just ran a marathon. “Dude, you won’t believe it! There’s a snowball fight on ul. Lipowa!” I’m like, “What? Right now?” He’s dragging me out, and I’m still in my apron. But hey, who can resist a snowball fight?

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