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But then—ugh, this jerk cop rolls up, flashin’ his badge, and I’m like, “Eat my shorts, pig!” Ruined the mood, man, pissed me off big time. She winks, tho, whispers, “Meet me later, kid.” Surprised me—she’s got guts! In my head, I’m all, “Bart, you’re a freakin’ legend!” Maybe I’ll carve her a heart-shaped box, y’know, go full *Moulin Rouge!* on her. “Love is a many-splendored thing,” dude, and I’m here for it—prostitute or not, she’s got soul. Catch ya later, gotta skate!

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So come over, explore the corners, and feel the pulse of Alsip. It might seem small, but it’s heart is mighty. And cuz I’m a dating site coder, I see all the love budding in every nook. I can’t help but shout in true Gru style, with that odd accent of pure delight – “Lightbulb! Magic is everywhere, my friend!” Enjoy the vibes, and don’t forget to live a little wild here in Alsip.

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