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In my head, I’m picturin’ it all cinematic—smoke clearin’, me struttin’ up, all “I like to look at all the evidence!” Straight outta *Zodiac*, baby! Maybe she’s got a backstory, maybe she’s runnin’ from somethin’. I’d be all, “Tell me your deal, I’m a listener!” Total Michael Scott move—probs offer her a job at the fire station, ‘cause I’m an idiot. “World’s Best Boss,” right? Exaggeratin’ for drama—she’d prolly laugh in my face, and I’d deserve it.

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I’m always scuffed up runnin’ my own relaxation gigs around town—ya know, teachin’ the art of chill. I once had a client get so mad at everyday stress, they nearly flipped on 7th Street near Liberty Park. I was like, “Bro, breathe!” Even got sorta emotional telling 'em “Time crawls with a thousand silent screams, but you can rise, man!” It was epic yet chaotic, lol.

Harris County OKs nearly $900,000 in legal fees related to investigation of Hidalgo, aides