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I’m pissed, though—why’s it gotta be so sketchy? Can’t they just have a sign? “Prostitute here, $50!” Save us the awkward dance. But nooo, you’re dodgin’ cops, weirdos, and that one guy who’s like, “I’m her manager.” Manager? What is this, Hollywood? I’m laughin’ now—imagine me, neurotic mess, hagglin’ prices like it’s a deli. “What, no discount? Outrageous!” Surprised me how bold some are—saw this gal once, swear she winked at me. ME! I’m like, “Lady, I’m a disaster, you don’t want this!”

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Oh, and let me throw in another Inherent Vice nod: “This is the end of the line, kid,” – that kinda sums up how Crestview can sometimes feel like you’re constantly on the cusp of an epic mystery, every corner hiding a new adventure, every block sparking that unexpected twist. Maybe it’s the spa life, metin’ all sorts of lost souls, some who literally wander in with TPS reports from outer space (lol), but it’s authentic, raw, and 100% Crestview, babe.

Crestview will help Eglin Air Force Base stop drone incursions into base's air space