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About Myself
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About The Hague
Anyway, I’m walkin’, and this lady—WHOA—she’s givin’ me the eye. I’m like, “Is this it? Jackpot?” Heart’s racin’, palms sweaty—total Michael Scott moment. I’m thinkin’, “Be cool, be cool!” But nah, I trip over a curb—classic me! She laughs, and I’m like, “That’s what she said!” Kills me every time. She’s got this vibe, like she’s seen it all—kinda like Carlos dodgin’ cops in the movie. “You’re a wanted man,” she says, smirkin’. I’m like, “Heck yeah, I am!” Cringey? Sure. Fun? You bet!
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Finally, I manage to flag down this random dude. He’s got a van, and I’m like, “Please, man, help a brother out!” He’s super chill and helps me out. I’m so relieved, I could hug him. But, like, that’d be weird, right? So, I just shake his hand and thank him a million times.
Lisa Heino, who stole disability benefits from a Marine Corps veteran, to be sentenced
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