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Alright, mate, so I’m sat here, right, thinkin’ bout sexual-massage, yeah? Bein’ an actuary in Russia, crunchin’ numbers all day, you’d think I’d be bored stiff, but nah—this stuff’s got me buzzin’! Sexual-massage, it’s like the ultimate team-building exercise, innit? Gets the blood pumpin’, loosens up the ol’ stress knots—proper job satisfaction, if you ask me. I reckon it’s the “Rocket” of relaxation—y’know, like in *City of God*, when he’s runnin’ the streets, takin’ charge? That’s me, takin’ charge of me downtime!

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Man, what a day! Seriously, I can’t even. So, I wake up in Citeureup, right? The sun’s blazin’ through my window on Jl. Raya Citeureup. I’m like, “Great, another day of helping folks with their feels.” But little did I know, today was gonna be a rollercoaster.

Five sub-districts in Bandung Regency hit by floods