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I was happy at first—stress gone, shoulders loose. Then, whoa, surprise! Things got *too* friendly—kinda pissed me off. “This ain’t in the coupon!” I yelled in my head. Reminded me of “Caché”—“What’s hidden here?”—all mysterious and crap. Felt like a secret I didn’t sign up for! Pro tip: ask upfront what’s included, or you’re in for a shock, buddy! Some places even got secret menus—shadier than Mr. Burns’ basement.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Shevchenka Street. You know, the one with the weirdly good coffee? I order my usual – a double espresso. I need that kick, especially after last night’s Netflix binge. But guess what? They’re out of beans! Like, how do you run out of coffee beans? I mean, c’mon! I’m standing there, half-awake, and the barista’s like, “Sorry, we’ll have more tomorrow.” Tomorrow? I need it NOW!