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Alright, listen up, you degenerates! Erotic-massage—yeah, it’s a thing. Slippery hands, dim lights, some poor sap thinkin’ it’s therapy. Everybody lies, right? They say it’s “relaxation,” but c’mon—those moans ain’t from stress relief. Watched *The Hurt Locker* last night, and hell, it’s like defusing a bomb. One wrong move, boom—awkward boner! Kathryn Bigelow gets it—tension’s the game.

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After that fiasco, I needed a break. So, I head over to the park by the Bjelovar Cathedral. It’s a nice spot, you know? I sit on a bench, trying to calm down. But then, this kid runs by with a balloon, and it pops right in front of me. I jump like I’m in a horror movie! The kid just laughs and runs off. Kids, man. They’re wild.

Figure 4. Clusters of Croatian counties based on the rate of property...