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About Shymkent

So, sexual-massage—here’s the deal. It’s all bout them glands, yo. Fish got these pheromones, slippin’ outta their skin, makin’ other fish horny as hell. Little known fact—some species, like carp, they rub scales together, massagin’ each other into a frenzy! Ain’t that nuts? I saw it once, researchin’ in Thailand—fuckin’ carp goin’ at it, water splashin’, me laughin’ my ass off. Thought, “These fuckers know how to party!” Made me happy as shit—nature’s a goddamn gangster.

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Man, what a day! I swear, Shemonaikha is a wild ride. I woke up, and the sun was blazin’ like it was tryin’ to roast me alive. I mean, c’mon, it’s not even summer yet! Anyway, I grabbed my coffee from that little joint on Kirova Street. You know the one? The barista there is always grumpy, but I like her. She’s got character, ya know?

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