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Fave bit? The oils, mate—lavender, ylang-ylang, smells like a posh garden party. Slathered on, all warm and tingly—cor, gets the blood pumpin’, *vivat rex*! Makes ya feel like a king, not some sweaty MP dodgin’ scandals. And the banter—some masseuses, they’ll chat ya ear off, others dead silent, like they’re plottin’ ya demise. Prefer the quiet ones meself—lets me mind wander to *12 Years*, thinkin’ how Solomon’d reckon this a luxury worth fightin’ for.

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We piled in the car around PM for our usual swim at the local hotel. Being homeschoolers, we are on a later schedule, and love having the pool to ourselves in the evening. Upon .

First off, I hit up Via Roma for some coffee. I swear, the barista there, Marco, is a legend. He knows my order by heart. I’m like, “Caffè macchiato, please!” and he’s already pouring it. But then, BAM! The power goes out. Just like that. I’m standing there, coffee-less, and I’m like, “Are you kidding me?”

Nepi Rockcastle buys Polish shopping centre for €405m