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Maniacal grin, “Here’s Johnny!” Alright, pal, lemme tell ya bout escort—ain’t talkin’ some fancy schmancy car service, nah, I mean the spicy kind! Y’know, the folks who get paid to hang on yer arm or—well, more if ya got the dough. Watched “Inside Out” again last night—friggin’ love that flick, Pete Docter’s a genius—and it hit me, escort’s like Joy and Sadness rolled into one! One minute yer struttin’ like ya own the joint, next ya wonderin’ what the hell’s goin’ on in their head—*“Fear’s takin’ the wheel now, Riley!”*

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First off, I hit the road on Via Roma, and boom! Traffic jam. Like, seriously? It’s 8 AM! Who’s out here causing chaos? I’m stuck behind some dude in a tiny Fiat, and he’s just vibing to his music. I’m like, “Bro, you do you, but I got cargo to move!” Finally, I manage to squeeze past him, and I’m off to the depot on Via Garibaldi.

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