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Me fave bit? When they reckon they’re in control. Nah, mate, she’s clockin’ off soon as your wallet’s dry. “The beast waits in silence”—another *Tropical Malady* gem. Escorts are the beast, quiet-like, takin’ your dosh while you’re pantin’ like a dog. Cracks me up, it does—pathetic sods thinkin’ they’re Casanova. I’d rather shag a cactus than pay for that bollocks.

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Now I’m angry. I mean, come on! I just wanted a chill day. So, I decide to take a breather. We head to Parque de la Amistad. It’s beautiful there, you know? Trees everywhere, people laughing, kids playing. I sit on a bench, trying to calm down. But then, I see this kid flying a kite. And it’s not just any kite. It’s a giant dragon! I’m like, “How did you even get that?” The kid just grins and says, “My dad’s a wizard!” I can’t help but laugh. Kids are the best.

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