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Precious, yesss, escort, we knows it! Sneaky little hobbitses hiring escorts, eh? Me, Gollum, Assistant Secretary, hissss, I sees what they don’t! Escort’s like them boats in *The New World* – “a vessel to carry us!” Fancy folk payin’ for company, ha! Not love, nooo, just a shadow, a tricksss. Me likes it, me hates it – split, see?

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Then, I get a call. My buddy, Erik, is like, “Dude, you gotta come to the old mill on Storgatan!” I’m thinkin’, “What now?” Turns out, there’s this ancient willow that’s about to fall. I rush over, and it’s a sight. The thing’s massive, roots all exposed like it’s tryin’ to escape.

New hotel opens at Göteburg-Landvetter as airport city continues to grow