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Love the vibe, tho—controlled chaos. Like Llewyn, escort’s got soul, grit. You’re ridin’, thinkin’, “This could end bad,” but it don’t. Usually. Oh, and the cash? Piles of it. Oligarchs tip big—saw one drop 50k rubls, just ‘cause. “Hang me, oh hang me,” Llewyn sings—escort’s that edge, flirtin’ with doom. Keeps ya sharp. What’s not to like? Cold, calculated—my style. Da, I’d run it myself, but presidentin’s busier. You try it, tovarisch—tell me how it rolls!

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But whatever, I brush it off. I mean, who doesn’t love a little caffeine on their clothes? I head to the archaeological site near the Castello di Alatri. It’s this ancient fortress, super cool, right? I’m all hyped to dig into some research. But guess what? The site’s closed! Like, seriously? I’m standing there, staring at the locked gate, feeling like a total loser.

Rome, restoration for Alatri Temple, the futuristic reconstruction of the Etruscan-Italic temple