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Me? I’m obsessed—love the power play. You’re layin’ there, naked, vulnerable, and bam—someone’s hands own you. Got me happy as a kid with candy once. This chick in Bangkok, swear she had magic fingers, worked knots I didn’t know I had. Felt like she whispered, *“I’m telling you for the last time!”*—y’know, that stern Haneke vibe. Total domination, I was shook! Cost me a fortune tho—pissed me off, wallet crying, but worth it.

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After that, I head down to the Rhine. The water’s calling my name, ya know? I’m all geared up, ready to dive into the deep blue. But then, bam! I see this group of tourists on the bridge. They’re taking selfies, and one of them drops their phone. It’s like slow-mo, and I’m just standing there, thinking, “Dude, that’s gonna hurt.” And it does! The phone goes splat on the rocks. I can’t help but laugh. Like, who needs a phone when you’ve got a view like this?

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