Allison Sevnica Sexual Massage ❤️

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Oi, mate, it’s me, James Bond—suave, “shaken, not stirred.” Reckon I’m a lumberjack too, choppin’ wood, livin’ wild. So, sexual-massage, yeah? Bloody brilliant, innit? Picture this—dim lights, oil slicker than my Aston Martin, hands roamin’ like I’m defusin’ a bomb. Gets me thinkin’ of “The Royal Tenenbaums”—you know, my fave flick. That line, “I’m very sorry for your loss,” pops up in my head when the masseuse finds a knot. Deadpan, sarcastic, like Richie Tenenbaum after a breakup.

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But then, I see this group of tourists. They’re lost. Like, really lost. They’re looking at a map like it’s a Rubik’s cube. I can’t help it. I walk over and say, “Hey, you guys need a GPS or something?” They laugh, and I end up giving them directions to the nearest bakery. I mean, who doesn’t love pastries, right?

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