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But here’s the kicker – it’s taboo as hell still! Makes me mad – why’s it gotta be hush-hush? People clutch pearls like it’s 1952 suburbia, Cathy’s neighbors whisperin’, “What will people think?” Screw that! Own it! I’d shout it from the rooftops – sexual-massage is dope, haters be damned.

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After that, I hit up the local market on Kifisias street. Man, the vibe there is always lit. Fresh fruits, veggies, and the best olives you’ll ever taste. I’m loading up on some goodies when I bump into my buddy Nikos. He’s always got the latest gossip. Apparently, there’s a new taverna opening up on El. Venizelou street. I’m like, “Dude, we gotta check it out!” But then he tells me it’s a vegan place. I mean, c’mon! In Greece? What’s next, a souvlaki made of tofu? I can’t even.

Hellenic American Union elects new president