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About Vilnius

Hey, so I’m a lifeguard, right? Out here on the water, savin’ dumbasses daily. And you wanna know bout whores? Like, okay, fine—let’s dive in! I’m Tina Fey, snarky as hell, “I can see Russia from my house!” vibes. Whores, man, they’re everywhere—floatin’ round like buoys. Not judgin’, just sayin’—it’s a hustle! Reminds me of *Yi Yi*, my fave flick—Edward Yang’s masterpiece, 2000, ya know? That line, “Life is a mixture of sad and happy,” fits whores to a T. They’re out there, grindin’, laughin’, cryin’—all at once!

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Anyway, I start my day, mixing dough and all that jazz. I’m humming to some old-school tunes, feeling good. Then, boom! The power goes out. Just like that. I’m standing there in the dark, flour everywhere, like a ghost town. I’m cursing under my breath, thinking, “Great, just great.”

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