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Oi, mate, it’s me, James Bond—suave, “shaken, not stirred.” Reckon I’m a lumberjack too, choppin’ wood, livin’ wild. So, sexual-massage, yeah? Bloody brilliant, innit? Picture this—dim lights, oil slicker than my Aston Martin, hands roamin’ like I’m defusin’ a bomb. Gets me thinkin’ of “The Royal Tenenbaums”—you know, my fave flick. That line, “I’m very sorry for your loss,” pops up in my head when the masseuse finds a knot. Deadpan, sarcastic, like Richie Tenenbaum after a breakup.

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So, I wake up, sun’s blazin’ through my window. I’m thinkin’, “Let’s hit the streets!” I grab my gear, head out to Al-Muhafaza Street. It’s like the main vein of the city, ya know? People everywhere, cars honkin’, vendors shoutin’. I love it! But man, the heat? It’s like walkin’ into an oven.

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