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We get to it, right, in some grotty alley—smells like death’s armpit. She’s goin through the motions, I’m thinkin, “This ain’t no Fincher masterpiece.” Then—surprise!—her pimp rolls up, big geezer, all “Who’s this prick?” I’m leggin it, screamin, “I’m not Robert Downey Jr, mate!” Nearly shat meself, but fuck me, it was hilarious! Prossies, man—they’ll rob ya blind or get ya battered, and I’m still laughin. Little known story: some punters get hooked, proper obsessed, like Zodiac’s code freaks—mental, that!

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I'm not kidding when I say—err, smitten by that unrefined spirit. My favorite spot? The little hidden cafe on Rue des Fleurs. Chill vibe, mismatched chairs, and coffee that burns you a bit—yep, perfect for mulling life’s madness. You bet I get emotional when I'm there. It’s raw, so raw—like a heartbeat, err, real and rough.

Ettelbruck: Police conduct drug checks in multiple bars