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Now, *Brokeback* – “there’s no reins on this one” – that’s erotic-massage for ya! No rules, just slidin’ about, oil slick as a politician’s promise. I reckon Ennis and Jack could’ve used a good knead, loosen up that angst. Me, I’d be rubbish at givin’ it – sausage fingers, all thumbs, I’d probs elbow someone’s spine out! Got me thinkin’, though – what if I’d tried it on me ol’ mate Dave Cameron? “Oi, Dave, fancy a rubdown?” He’d have legged it faster than you can say *Eton mess*! Made me chuckle, that.

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After lunch, I decide to stroll down to the old train station. It’s kinda eerie, but I love it. The graffiti on the walls tells stories. I’m snapping pics when I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and a bunch of kids are playing soccer, and they just smashed a window. I’m like, “Oh man, they’re gonna get in trouble.” But they just laugh and run off. Classic Zefyri kids.

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