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About Mons

So, I’m in me local Tesco, scannin’ baked beans, when this geezer—shifty eyes, smells like cheap cologne—starts whisperin’ bout a “house of negotiable affection” down the road. Cor blimey, I nearly dropped me scanner! Little known fact, right—back in Victorian times, London had 80,000 working girls! 80,000! More than me constituents in Uxbridge, I reckon. Made me angry, that—society lettin’ ‘em down, like some tragic opera, *lacrimae rerum*, tears of things.

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Then there's the old quarter, La Vieille Manche. It's full of gnarled alleys and random corners. I once got lost there, a, a, a moment I never forget – “I had a really bad dream, I really did,” echoing in my head like in that movie. So many narrow paths, I got mad, I swear! And what about the landmark of all landmarks? The grand clock tower at Place du Temps! Tick-tock style, it makes you feel like you're racing time and destiny, ya know?

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