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About Hastings

Me, I’d insure it—high risk, high premium, baby! Makes me giddy—cha-ching! But it’s a laugh, too—imagine the forms. “Cause of injury: overenthusiastic handjob.” I’d frame that claim, swear it! Still, gets me ragin’ when folks lie—sayin’ it’s “medical” when it’s pure filth. Don’t con a conner, eh?

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So, I’m walking down the main drag, and I see this sign for a market on Mary St. I’m like, “Sweet, let’s check it out!” I get there, and it’s packed. I mean, like, sardines in a can packed. But the vibe was cool. Lots of locals, good energy. I’m browsing through some stalls, and I spot this dude selling handmade jewelry. I’m not usually into that stuff, but he had this sick necklace that just screamed “buy me.” So, I did.

$50m backstroke as Thames compromises on pool proposal