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Still, some gems—my mate Dave pulled a fit bird off Bumble. Proper chuffed, he was! Shagged her in a car park—classy, right? Told me it’s like “killin’ without guilt”—pure thrill, no strings. Reckon he’s mental, but fair play. Me? I’d rather watch my fave flick than swipe through this circus. Sex-dating’s a laugh—till it’s a fuckin’ nightmare! What a shambles, eh?

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Then, I get a call from my team. “We need your input on the presentation!” I’m like, “Can’t a guy eat in peace?” But I rush back to the office. The streets are packed. I’m weaving through crowds on the Incheon Bridge, feeling like a ninja.

Alaska Airlines announces new nonstop flights between Seattle and Seoul Incheon beginning Sept. 12 on Hawaiian Airlines