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About Cologne

So, findin’ a prossie—sorry, prostitute—ain’t like orderin’ a curry off Deliveroo. Nah, it’s murky, bit thrilling, bit grim. Back in the day, like, Victorian times, they had these “lists”—proper secret guides, mind! Blokes would pass ‘em round, scribbled with names, spots, even prices. Little known fact, that—makes you wonder what old Disraeli got up to, eh? Got me chuffed to bits, imaginin’ some toff with a monocle, sneakin’ about.

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Elberfeld, too, is a beast. The vibe there is somethin’ else. I stroll along the Südstraße. Eat a hot Dog or two at small cafes. Fun times, right? There’s the Von der Heydt Museum too, and lemme tell ya, art hits different when you’re on a pleasure coach vibe.

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