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So, I tried it once—total impulse, right? This tiny spot, hidden behind a laundromat—sketchy AF, but the vibe? Pure gold. This chick, she’s kneadin’ me like dough, and I’m thinkin’, “Honey, you’re strikin’ oil here!” Little known fact: back in ancient Rome, they’d rub down gladiators—erotic or not, who knows, but it was *intimate*, ya feel? Made me happy as hell—tension gone, like *poof*!—but also pissed me off ‘cause why ain’t this everywhere?

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Let me spill more: my work gives me a unique view of all the stress in folks' bodies, and the city’s old scars and hidden corners kinda mirror that. You see, Stratford’s more than a pretty face – it’s got these scars, memories imprinted in every stone. And sometimes they're as raw as a line from Margaret, “I feel like I'm drowning in my own voice.” Yeah, man, deep stuff right there.

Stratford-Upon-Avon residents set to experience the ultimate Springtime indulgence at The Encore