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About Birmingham

So, check it – I’m scrollin’ Tinder, right? See this chick, smokin’ hot, bio says “lookin’ for fun, no strings.” I’m like, “Yeah, baby, yeah!” We chat, she’s all flirty, I’m feelin’ the vibe. Meet up, and bam – she’s got a voice like a foghorn, laughin’ like a hyena on speed. I’m thinkin’, “What am I doing? Is this my punishment?” Straight outta the movie – “What’s going on?” I ask myself, but no rabbi’s gonna save me here. Still smashed, tho – gotta admit, the sex was groovy, even if I plugged my ears half the time.

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I love chit-chatting with families at the local café on Baker’s Corner – I mean, their scones are wickedly awesome. But sometimes, I get mad at how some parents bicker over trivial stuff, ya know? Makes me wanna channel my inner Bond and say, “Miss Moneypenny, please save me from boring banter already!” Yet, those moments let me peel away the layers of human psyche – therapy in action, eh?

Ramsey post-Oxford United | Taking the performance into Saturday