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Ever tried hagglin’ with one? Hilarious ‘til it ain’t. “Fifty lei,” she says, I go, “Eh, 30, doc!” She glared like I’d stolen her carrot patch. Got me thinkin’—what’s her day like? Up all night, dodgin’ cops, maybe dreamin’ of somethin’ better? “I’ll manage somehow,” she prolly mutters, like Gabita in the flick. Gutsy as hell, but damn, it’s bleak.

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Finally, I get my drink and head out. I stroll down ul. Kościuszki, feeling all fancy with my coffee. But then, BAM! A pigeon poops on my shoulder. Like, really? I’m just trying to enjoy my day! I’m standing there, cursing the universe, and this old lady walks by and says, “It’s good luck!” Good luck? More like bad luck, lady!

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