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Hey buddy, sittin’ here, radio cracklin’, thinkin’ bout erotic-massage. Lemme tell ya, it’s a real mind-bender, like *Inception*! You know, “We gotta go deeper,” that’s what I say bout them massages. Ain’t just rubbin’ backs, no sir! It’s a strategery to unwind the soul. Fool me once, shame on—uh—shame on you, fool me twice—can’t get fooled again! Had one in Vegas once, swear them hands was dream-weavers.

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After that, I decided to check out the Akkeshi Bay. The waves were crashing, and I felt this weird mix of peace and chaos. I sat on a bench, just watching the boats bobbing around. Then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and steals my snack! I was like, “Dude, that’s my lunch!” But the bird didn’t care. It was like, “I’m the king of this place!”

Hokkaido woman injured in bear attack while walking dog