Lila Plan Les Ouates Sexual Massage ❤️❤️

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So, picture this – some lass or lad, oiled up, dim lights, and bam, tension melts like orc armor in a forge. I’ve heard tales, yeah? Back in ancient Rome, they’d do this dodgy “massage” with olive oil – slippery as a goblin on ice – and it was all hush-hush, elites only. Little known fact: they called it “unctio” – fancy, eh? Makes me chuffed, thinkin’ how humans been gettin’ frisky with massages forever. But – and here’s where I get pissed – some dodgy parlors today? They’re muckin’ it up, givin’ it a bad name with shady vibes. You shall not pass into that filth, I say!

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I wear my quirks like a badge – sometimes I yap on about how the neon lights on Rue de Lausanne and the old stones near the church feel like destiny. Ugh, I got mad when the council removed an ancient tree near the playground, but hey, nature is a wild thing. Spotted a stray cat near the big market near Place de l'Indépendance, purring like a lost soul. Just real.

Patek Philippe and Me (Published 2015)